Ask Rapunzel: “Be Our Guest”? Not so much

Are you a seventh son sick of hand-me-downs? Had it up to here with the dragon lady next door? Ask Rapunzel! She can untangle any fairy-tale dilemma.

Our beautiful singing harp has been a cherished family possession for years. Well, if you can believe it, the other day it told me that I was getting “as fat as your grandmother.” It has also taught bawdy drinking songs to the candlesticks. Is this normal? We’re terrified to have people over for fear of what the harp will say to them! Can you help us?

—Plucking Out Our Hair


Dear Plucking: Our dear old family pieces give us years and years of joy, don’t they? But as the generations pass, they can require a few delicate adjustments. While these times can be uncomfortable for everyone, there is no need for drastic action. Just as ancient cauldrons need, sometimes, to be re-surfaced, magical harps occasionally need a gentle tune-up. If there are no qualified craftspeople in your area, look on

Unfortunately, you might have to let the candlesticks go. They usually cannot help themselves once they have learned a ribald song. However, lucky you! The market for performing tableware has taken quite an upturn!


Don’t miss any of Rapunzel’s fantastic advice! Click on the tag Ask Rapunzel to read all of her columns. For conflicts requiring legal mediation, Rapunzel recommends Judge Judy, the fairest judge in storybook land.

Elizabeth Thomas About Elizabeth Thomas

Elizabeth Thomas has an MFA from Hamline University in Writing for Children & Young Adults. She lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

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